IF YOU’RE TRANS YOU’RE NOT SPECIAL
It has never been easier to be a transgender woman in the United states. That is a pretty broad statement since congress is always working their little finger to the bone to take away rights from all the lgbt+ people, but that has always been the case for the past except for when Michelle Obama was in power. Right now that is not the case though. But I live in Chicago and I could be wearing fishnets, jean shorts falling apart at the seams and a bra with tassels and I will risk no micro-aggressions. Nobody is gonna keep me in check or make sure I at least have a tragic backstory. I guess this should be a good thing, but just a few years ago a guy wearing lipstick could get tied to a tree and then go on Ellen as compensation for the splinters. Today trees are for squirrels only and with past talk shows like Ellen, Graham Norton and Jimmy Fallon, gay talk show hosts are cliche. I’m saying that nobody is coming to save me and give me special treatment for being a part of a community where we take mysterious pills that give us tender nipples and bad attitudes. To be honest being, trans is something I try my best not to think about because I am probably the one most uncomfortable by it. At the end of the day I’m the one who has to put my balls up my ass each day. But outside of that inconvenience, I am treated like any other gal on the street. I am so much more than that. My pubic hair grows deep and dark. I saw my sister's pubes and they are almost translucent. I haven’t seen too many sets of pubes on girls before, but if it makes anyone feel better I really want to see more. I could get a gym membership and wait by the showers, but even then most people are fully waxed or trimmed. This makes one of the worst focus groups you can imagine. One time I was apart of a focus group. I was on the bus and someone peed all over the floor. I didn’t know if it was the woman screaming at her reflection or the man trying to eat the chair. I guess that’s not really a focus group. Maybe more of a nightmare. Trying to pluck a girl’s pube so I can take it home to my magnifying glass is kinda a nightmare too! I guess not really. Maybe a crime or assault. I think it’s both. I would never do that and to even have a record that I would even think that scares the living pubes off of me, cause as a trans woman, no talk show host is coming to save me anymore. It’s not 2015 anymore. I am about as unique as the thousands of other black pubes growing thickly out of my body. And people are gonna say, “if you pee on the bus thats kinda unique.” But if I did that, the man sipping lean out of a ziplock bag might think we’re friends. All the good ones have seemingly left the chat.
